Day 3/Lugano and Cuomo

The time differences between countries throughout the world has always fascinated me. Our group of twelve left Iowa at 11:30 AM On Thursday October 11, traveled across the Atlantic Ocean and now at 11:00 PM Friday, Luann and I were getting ready to enjoy our first night's sleep in Northern Italy. I like hotels and I have a routine before bed that I normally follow. I have to make sure I know how to run the TV and will turn it on and watch it for a while before I fall asleep. Even though we had been awake all those hours, I did not vary from my routine. As Luann read a little, I turned the television on and tried to watch it. Every channel, all fifteen of them, were in Italian. I tried to understand as much as I could, but it was futile. I also had another problem. The remote control for the set was so worn that I couldn't see where the volume and channel controls were. I had to keep getting up to adjust the controls manually. To make matters worse, the TV was nothing like I had ever seen. The power light would remain on when I shut it off, which made me fear that the TV could suddenly turn on at any time during the night. That would be a terrible thing for Luann as she is a light sleeper. Without my hearing aids in, I would sleep through it. I finally got the TV under control after a wasted half hour and I was ready for sleep. Luann was still reading when my head hit the pillow and I fell into a deep sleep.

I always like to think of myself as being real tough and things like jet lag don't bother me. I am now in a very deep sleep and I am having a dream related to my last business venture, when I suddenly wake up. It takes me a few seconds to realize that I am not in my own bed, but I can't figure out where I am. The room is black, not dark, but black. I can't see anything. I now remember that I am on vacation in Italy and this is my hotel room. I see the outline of the patio doors, which I now remember has a huge window blind made of thick plastic or soft rubber over the panes of glass. The draw strings were not string, but resembled the rubber straps that are used by flat bed semis to keep the tarps in place. Putting the blinds down was similar to a lat pull exercise I do on my Bow Flex machine. These blinds were amazing. There was absolutely no light coming into this room, let alone any noise. It was spooky. I looked around the room and could see nothing. I was now wishing I had left the power light on on the TV so I could see something. I new Luann was somewhere nearby, but I was afraid to put my hand across the bed. To make matters worse, I was wide awake and not sleepy anymore. I had no idea what time it was. We didn't have a clock in the room. I have never been in a situation in my life where I had absolutely no conception of time. Now it was time for the mind game.

As I laid there in bed, in a panic, I tried to figure out what time it was. I knew that I had slept soundly, so that meant I must have gotten at least six hours of sleep. It must be 5:00 AM. and could possibly be later. Then I would consider the fact that maybe I only took a one hour deep nap and the time was midnight or 1:00 AM. That thought really frightened me because we were going on tour at 8:30 AM and I would have a heck of time laying here for seven hours. I was delirious. Maybe I was still dreaming and asleep. No such luck. I lay there, fighting my imagination on what tomorrow would be like if I really had not slept. I frantically searched for some semblance of time in that room. I finally got the nerve to get out of bed. I had been afraid to get up earlier, for fear of waking Luann, but I was now desperate. I pulled back the blinds and took a peak. Nothing but darkness. We were surrounded by buildings and we were on the second floor, so if the sun was coming out, I wouldn't be able to see it any way. I looked at the street below me. Nothing, not a soul. It was Saturday morning, hopefully, and maybe people weren't out yet. I looked for a clock on the Church. Nothing. I closed the blinds and had to stay still until my eyes adjusted to the black room behind me. I sat on the bed and thought. Bathroom. I will work my way to the bathroom and maybe I will see something on Luann's night table that would help me. I had to move my hands along the bed as I walked towards the bathroom because I knew the desk/table combination nearby and I hated the thought of crashing into something. That would normally elicit a vulgar outcry and Luann doesn't like it when I use that kind of language, even though it does ease the pain. I made it past the closet, nothing on her night stand. Boy, this was really a nightmare. I made it this far, I may as well go to the bathroom and at least turn on the light. I closed the bathroom door, switched on the light, looked at the bidet on the floor and wondered if it was possible that this was a urinal. I looked at my face in the mirror and shuddered and to make matters worse, I didn't have to go. That meant, it must be earlier, not later. I must not have slept much. I left the bathroom depressed, shut the light off and worked my way back along the passageway back to my side of the bed. I still had not seen Luann in the darkness. I lay there for what seemed hours falling in and out of sleep until finally, I heard Luann get up. That was my signal that it was day time and we could get up now. I still could not see any light because of the blinds. It all seemed like a dream and I had slept some, though I had no idea how much or how little.

One of the advantages of tour groups is that many of your meals are included. This was no exception. Breakfast started at 7:00 AM and we were to board the bus for our first tour at 8:30. Luann and I showered and headed for the dining room. I still did not know what time it was. I mentioned this to Luann and she informed that she could look on her cell phone. Why didn't I think of that the night before? To make it even worse, she told me that she was awake the whole time I was fumbling around last night. I felt like a fool thinking about it. We had to use a quick mathematical calculation to arrive at the time. It was almost 8:00 AM. We had to take the time on the cell phone and add six hours to it. If we wanted to know what time it was back home, we had to subtract seven hours because the phone was on Eastern time. Luann and I don't wear watches so we rely on our cell phones for the time. She was trialing a new Blackberry for the company she works for and it had all the latest bells and whistles on it. I didn't tell her that I wasn't impressed that this latest technology tool couldn't give us the correct time. I couldn't afford to have her mad at me this early on the trip.

We were the last ones in the dining room and the waiter sat us at at a table with another couple. I wanted to sit somewhere else, but apparently it wasn't allowed. We sat with a couple from Michigan, Mary Jo and Fred. They were very nice people and I will admit, if it wasn't for Luann I would be clue less about how nice people are because half of the time I miss what they are saying about themselves. This was another one of those case. Mary Jo had to be one of the softest speaking people I have ever heard. Fred wasn't very loud either, but he didn't talk much. Mary Jo would say something and I would look over to Luann for my cue on whether I was supposed to reply or something. I played with my hearing aids, but I could hardly make out what she was saying. To complicate it, she had a mouth that barely moved and when it moved, it seemed like it wasn't in sync with the words. I thought I was watching one of those American movies, dubbed in Italian. I knew this breakfast conversation would be replayed for me on the bus so I quickly got up and headed for the food. Luann was lagging a little behind me as she was still being cordial with the Michigan couple.

Italian breakfast is a lot different than ours. They have the normal cereal and juices, but their breakfasts are loaded with bread, all you can eat. There are no scrambled or fried eggs, they have hard boiled eggs. There is a good variety of pastries and cakes, but there is no bacon. They have a cold cut meat tray with ham, other meats and cheese. The coffee at this location is served to us in small cups, not the big cups we are used to. It was healthy, no grease or fat. The bread had no preservatives, which made it light. I had more bread at this breakfast than I have back home in a month. We sat there enjoying our breakfast. I had a cheese sandwich, with a hard boiled egg, bread and butter rolls and coffee. Luann had the pastry, with ham and bread and coffee. As Mary Jo and Fred headed for the bus, Luann and I quickly ate the rest of our breakfast and went to join the others.

We climbed on board the bus, exchanged greetings with our fellow travelers and proceeded to climb into our seats. Luann took the aisle and I got the window. Pat and Sharon were across from us and had the premiere seats. Their seats were the first seats, on the left, as you enter the bus from the rear door, which is located in the middle of the bus. They had a rail that they could rest their arms on and the seats were deeper, which gave them more leg room. These seats will prove to be a point of controversy later in the trip. For now, we all sat and eagerly awaited for our rep to make her good morning speech and tell us what we were going to do today. It was the old people's pre-school field trip. All forty three fifty plus year olds listened while Melissa, I had just now learned her name, told us the rules. Rule #1: No food or drinks on the bus because it would not be fair to those on the bus that didn't have anything. Rule #2: Need to be on the bus when told because Collette Vacations had a tight time line with guides, schedules, etc. Rule #3. Today's trip was going to take three hours along the lake and into the mountains on our way to Switzerland. The view, she said, would be spectacular. However, once we got out of Stresa and started up the mountains, we would not be stopping for any service breaks (polite way of saying, NO BATHROOM STOPS). She even added some salt to the wound by telling us that she hoped we had prepared for this by taking care of those needs. Time for another mind game.

I have a serious mental condition when it comes to having to go to the bathroom. It stems from a childhood incident that happened to me at the age of four. It is a story that has been talked about in my family for decades and it will not be told here. My condition is this; If there is a bathroom available, I won't have to go very bad or very often. Tell me that there is no bathroom or make the bathroom hard to get to and I will have to go quickly and severely. I am now in a bus rumbling through narrow streets, passing by stores, gas stations and houses right and left on my way for a three hour trip with no bathroom break. I know my body. I have just eaten breakfast, drank coffee and juice. There is no way I will make it. Luann is upset with me a little because I have already made the reference that I don't like the little kid rules and don't like the tour rep and I have now started to pout. I am staring out the window imagining how I am going to address the situation when my body tells me it is time. How embarrassed will I be when I have to raise my hand and tell a young lady thirty years younger than me, in front of all these people, that I have to go real bad. What if there is no where to stop? Will I go on a hillside? Will I go knock on some body's door? Can I just get off the bus and head back to Stresa? All these thoughts are going through my head as we pass some of the most beautiful scenery in the world. Mountains on my left, the huge blue lake on my right. We are climbing up the narrow highway, sharing it with motorcycles, small cars, trucks, buses and an occasional bicycle. The day is perfectly clear and sunny and I am busy focusing on the clock at the front of the bus. I know that if I can get half of the three hours out of the way, I have a good chance of making it all the way. It is like the two minute drill in the NFL. I am counting down the time in fifteen minute intervals. The traffic is starting to get bad, as weekend travelers are heading to the resort towns along the lake. I am still pouting, upset that I did not take care of business, did not think of looking at the cell phone last night, could not figure the TV out and a waging whole bunch of self inflicting attacks on myself. Finally, it is half way, according to the clock on the bus, and we are at the Swiss border. As we stop, Melissa makes an announcement. I don't want to hear it. She surprises us by telling us that she needs to get the passport information (we did this last night) to the border patrol and we will be stopping for five minutes, no longer. There are bathrooms here if anyone needs to go. We cannot delay, however, see rule #2. No one moves. I don't have to go, but if someone gets up, I will force myself to go. No one moves. I am now convinced that I am on a bus with people that must take medication that keeps them from having to go. Melissa offers the bathrooms again. No one moves. I mutter something under my breath and Luann gives me the look. When I lost my hearing, she must have found it because she doesn't miss any negative comment I make. Her ears have to be bionic. No one is moving. Out of the corner of my eye, I catch one of the Michigan people getting up. Yes, someone is going to go. All of a sudden, it was like the recess bell had gone off. People were getting up and walking off. Most of them to have a cigarette break, others to look at the beautiful view and a few of us to go the bathroom. Though I didn't have to go, I went any way. A little insurance never hurts. We took ten minutes instead of five and happily boarded the bus without getting into any trouble. Life was good again.

The one thing different about this bus tour is that it is very quiet. There are not many announcements, not a lot of laughter and very little commotion. I start looking at the gorgeous scenery and really marvel at the beauty of this part of the world. The scenery here is probably not that different from the scenery in our country, but the fact the roads are so narrow and it seems like everything is packed so tightly makes it look a lot different. I occupied the rest of the trip to Lugano looking out the window and watching some of the people in the bus dozing off. Sharon would ask me on occasion what a billboard or shop sign meant. It was really fun being in a different country and at least knowing some of the language.

The bus started slowing down as we entered the outskirts of Lugano Switzerland. The traffic was pretty much bumper to bumper as we progressed through small towns. I started seeing some signs that we were in Switzerland, like billboards in Swedish. I felt pretty stupid when I thought there were a lot of first aid stations in this country, when actually they were buildings flying the Swedish flag. I'm glad I didn't mention this to anyone. Melissa came on the PA system and told us a little bit of what were seeing and some of the history. By her own admission, she did not have a lot of experience or knowledge about this tour. We all knew she didn't have a lot of experience with fifty year old plus preschoolers. We wound down the narrow street that turned into the main street in Lugano. I noticed a long, steep flight of steps as we entered the town and filed that away in my memory. I would like to know where those steps lead. The bus moved along pretty quickly, so we were all constantly looking at the sail boats and ships parked along the wharf and at the pretty architecture that made up the city of Lugano. It was yet another gorgeous city, full of bustle. I couldn't wait to get off the bus, walk around and have lunch at an outdoor cafe.

Our driver had to go around the narrow streets of the city to be able to drop us off at the fountain that seemed to be the entrance point to the town. The fountain was located in front of a huge square that was surrounded by shops, restaurants, cobblestone streets and people. Across from the fountain, separated by the main highway, was the wharf with a beautiful mountain back drop and large lake already busy with sail boats and pleasure boats. The day was perfectly clear and warm enough for a short sleeve shirt and shorts. I brought my sweatshirt just in case. I really brought it so I could show off to the ardent Notre Dame fans that I had a Notre Dame hooded sweatshirt that my son Ian had given me for Christmas. Man, was I cool. Prior to getting off the bus, we had to get our instructions. The time was 11:15 AM and we would have to be back and in the bus between 12:30 and 12:45 PM for our 1:00 PM departure to Lake Cuomo. We had a whole hour and a half to savor what the town of Lugano had to offer.

Luann and I got off the bus, trying to figure out what direction to go first. Pat and Sharon quickly joined us and the four of us started making our way to the square, which looked like the most logical place to start sight seeing. Andy, one of the ardent Notre Dame fans I had met last night, approached us to show me his Notre Dame shirt under his coat. He was pretty proud of it, but it didn't compare to my sweatshirt. I proceeded to tell him that I had shirt just like his back at the hotel, except that mine was green not blue. He never mentioned his wardrobe to me the rest of the trip. Andy is a very nice guy.

Pat, Sharon, Luann and I made our way into the square among the hundreds of people shopping, eating and just hanging out. We walked up narrow cobblestone streets looking into shop windows and stopping at an occasional fruit vendor stand. The grapes looked great, along with the rest of the fruit. We saw chocolate shops, bakeries, small bars, banks, jewelry stores and anything else you could imagine. It was late Saturday morning and the activity on these streets was probably not much different than back home. It was the architecture and the infrastructure that made this so much different. We followed one of the wider streets towards the part of the town we had come in from on the bus. The ladies had to use the restrooms, so we walked into a downtown store, which resembled a mall. I think Melissa had mentioned this to us on the bus as the place having the cleanest bathrooms. The one thing about Europe is that they really don't want people to use bathrooms. I arrive at this conclusion because they are all hidden. This store must have had five or six floors on it. The bathrooms are all the way on the top floor, in the back. Once we found them, we had to wait in line. Fortunately, it was not an issue for us but I couldn't help but think of the stress it would have caused, if I would have had to really go. This mall was big enough to support two or three bathrooms, not just one. We ran into Kenny and Shirley here, as they were needing the restrooms as well. While I waited for Luann, I walked over to the cafeteria on the same floor and saw that they sold horse meat sandwiches here. I offered to buy Kenny and Pat a sandwich, but they declined. The menu was in Italian and I knew the word for horse and they didn't. Years ago, I went on vacation with a good friend of mine and we teamed up with a couple of guys from Ohio, their names were Butch and Ollie. We were on the island of Guadeloupe in the West Indies at an outdoor beach bar and they sold horse meat burgers. The French, Italian and Spanish word for horse is very similar, but these guys didn't know any foreign language. All three of us ordered burgers and a beer at this place. When the waiter asked us in French if we wanted horse meat, they all looked at me. They must have thought I was a linguist extrodinare so I translated it for them. I told them the waiter wanted to know if they wanted everything on their burgers. The three of them quickly said yes. I declined. I don't know how they missed the condiments on the table. It took awhile, but lunch arrived and the three of us started eating. I could not quit laughing and they couldn't quit eating. It went like this until I finally asked them how their meal was. I had to tell them. Ollie turned a little green, chugged his beer and stopped. My buddy Dave and new friend Butch stopped, thought about it and finished the meal. I was sure I was going to catch them grazing on the straw thatch on top of the outdoor bar. We laughed about that the rest of the day, laying there in the sun. I couldn't pull it off with Kenny and Pat. I must have matured some since those days.

The four of us parted company with Kenny and Shirley and continued our walk. We started talking about lunch and eating somewhere when I noticed that we were close to the steep steps I had seen coming in. As we approched them, we saw they were very steep and led to a small building at the top. It had some historic significance and Luann said she wanted to walk up the steps. Pat walks back and forth to work every day (at least five mile round trip), Luann and I walk every day. I did not know about Sharon. She was a trooper and said she would walk, but would not go very fast since she has bad knees. The four of us walked up the steps and were rewarded with a gorgeous view of the city, the mountains and the lake and harbor. We could see for miles. I do not remember the historic significance to the building or the steps, but the walk was fruitful. We did not need to walk back down the steps because there was a city street that ran parallel to them. We walked down the residential street wondering what kind of rent payment or mortgage went with the property having this kind of view up here. The street took us back to the square. A quick look at Pat's watch showed us that we had enough time to grab a bite and then meet back at the bus. It was a little after noon. Time for a beer.

We settled on a busy outdoor restaurant at the far corner of the square. The restaurant was getting busier as we sat down and we waited for the waiter. We soon had menus in front of us and noticed that pizza was their specialty. Pat and I ordered a dark beer, which I was never able to find the rest of the trip, Luann a marguerita and Sharon a white wine, dry. Pat noticed that the pizzas were pretty big, so we decided that we would split a couple of them, which is customery back home. The waiter returned with our drinks and to take our order. To be safe, I asked him how big the pizzas were and he made a small circle with his two hands to indicate a serving much smaller than what we had seen as the actual size. Luann ordered a Margeurita pizza, which is tomato sauce and cheese. Sharon ordered one as well. The waiter asked me what I would like and I told him I would share Luann's pizza. He told me that the pizzas were not big enough to share and that I needed to have my own. I started getting a little annoyed with him and told him that I wasn't going to eat anything. He asked Pat and Pat responded the same way I did. He was going to share Sharon's pizza. The waiter was getting upset now and came over to Pat and I and took our napkins and forks, muttering under his breath that we weren't going to eat. The two pizzas came out a while later and they were big. They were equal in size to the large pizza back home. The four of us ate the two pizzas and could not understand why they would think that this was not sufficient. I noticed that the table next to us had a table of six people and each one had their own pizza, even the small six year old kids. The time was getting the best of us so we paid our bill to another waiter and got out of there. Our original waiter never came back to our table. I realized then that this must be the custom in Switzerland.

What followed later will live in my mind forever. We had been given instructions to be back at the bus between 12:30-12:45. The bus was to leave at 1:00PM for Cuomo. Luann had decided that if the bus left at 1:00, that was the time we needed to be back by. The rest of us thought the logic made absolute sense. As we made our way to the fountain and the bus, the clock on the wall behind the fountain read 12:58. We were on time. As we made our way to the bus, I had a strange sensation that all was not well. The bus was spewing smoke out of the exhaust like it had been running for hours. The bus was full of people. There were only four people not on the bus (us). At the front door of the bus was Melissa. She had changed drastically in that hour and a half. She had grown at least forty feet, her black hair had turned red, her two eyes had come together to form one big eye in the middle of her forehead, and I think her feet had become hooved. Boy, she looked mad and ready to devour us. Oh, Oh, we were going to get it. As we climbed back on, our heads were dropped because we realized that our fellow travelers had probably all been there since 12:30. While we were eating and enjoying the meal, the beverage and the weather, these people had been on the bus for half an hour sitting. I was a little embarrased. The only time I remember feeling this way was when Luann and I went to St. Lucia in the Caribbean with her brother Dennis and his wife Judy. We were at an all inclusive resort that provided watersport equipment, including sail boats. After a quick sailing tutorial, we got Luann and Judy to hop on the boat and we went sailing. The four us were merrily sailing along when we went around a small island and we lost the wind. None of us could figure out how to get back. We were only allowed to have the boat for an hour and rental place closed at 4:00. It was already 5:00 and we were just sitting there, not moving. It wasn't long before the motorboat from the resort showed up to pull us back to the resort. They made us get into the motor boat and the guy driving it was furious. We were not supposed to have gone this far, the lecturer told us. We think the resort must have announced it over their PA system that the Iowans who had stolen the boat from the rental place had been located and were being brought in to shore because the beach was filled with on lookers watching us get out of that motor boat. We had not said a word the whole way back and now we just looked at the sand as we got off the boat. We kept our heads down as we sprinted up the hill to our rooms, hoping nobody would recognize us at dinner. That's the way I felt as our bus jumped into gear and headed up the highway to return us to Italy and lake Cuomo.

It didn't take long for the microphone to get turned on. Here it comes. Melissa was now back to being 4'11" and 90 lbs. again. Her eyes had returned to normal and the deep monster voice had given way to her mild East Coast accent. She wanted to let us know that from now on, she would only be giving us a departure time as it was too confusing for people. In other words, because a small group of four violated rule #2 and got away with it, she was going to get serious with departure times. I looked at Luann and saw the glee in her face because Luann had told us at lunch that Melissa had screwed up by giving us the three time slots. Luann will never admit, but she likes it when she is right about things like that. I heard Luann and Sharon talking and they suspected that someone on the bus had complained about us being late. This bus was getting on my nerves.

As I watched the interstate fly by with traffic, I tried to figure out how to make the most of this bus tour. The time we were spending at these locations was not long enough for us to do the things we enjoy doing. We were going to have the same situation in Cuomo. An hour and a half was not enough time. The best memories I have of my last trip here, were with the train system. I had a great idea. I would venture to guess that we could stay in Cuomo as long as we wanted and catch a train back to Stresa. There was no group dinner tonight, so we didn't have anything to get back to. I couldn't wait to run this by Luann. One of the biggest challenges I have had with members of the opposite sex can be boiled down to one simple word, timing. I normally say the right thing at the wrong time or the wrong thing at the right time. I don't wait and test the environment, I just talk. This was another case of that happening. I turned to Luann and told her I had an idea. Right there, I had a problem. Idea and me are not synonymous with success, in Luann's mind, but I told her anyway. She must have thought that I told her my idea was to highjack the bus because of the look she gave me. I should have waited for another time to pop this on her because she apparently didn't want to hear it now.

After an hour ride, quiet ride I may add, we finally crossed the border and started our descent into Cuomo. The traffic going the opposite way was bumper to bumper and had even come to a standstill. It was backed up for miles, not one or two, but closer to ten. I dreaded going back this way, if indeed we had to return the way we came. On the other hand, we moved along nicely and could see the pretty town of Cuomo as we started down the hill. I wondered if it would be possible to find the hotel we stayed at eight years ago. The microphone chirped as Melissa got on for her travel tid bits. I just looked at the scenery. She told us that we would be going to a silk manufacturing plant on our first stop. I thought to myself that this might be interesting. I wanted to see the worms that excreted the stuff that became silk. I wanted to watch people run the looms that made it into fabric. I have heard of silk, but know nothing of how it is made. As we worked our way through the town, I could see a lot of familiar sights, but saw nothing of our old hotel. The bus finally stopped across the street from the silk factory and we all got out. This was the major thoroughfare going through Cuomo so the traffic was crazy. All forty three of us climbed off the bus and had to wait on the corner so we could go tour the silk factory as a group. If we didn't look like a bunch of little kids dressed in old people's bodies, I don't know what did. The light changed and we crossed.

The entrance to this place looked like an entrance to a department store or office building. We entered on the ground floor and went down a flight of stairs to the lower level. Outside the front doors were a series of small ponds that were filled with small rocks and not much more than six inches deep. I saw no purpose to these waterway. Inside the building, we were herded to a corner in the lower level where a nice young lady with a strong accent greeted us. I looked all around for any place that might be hiding the worms. I also thought that may be, there was another adjoining buiding where workers would be threading looms and making silk. In the corner, all forty three of us watched as the nice lady told us who she was and what she did. Where are the worms I thought? She did the unthinkable. She turned on a TV set and we are now watching a video. I have no idea what it was about, except that this was our tour. I had already lost Luann because she took off with Pat and Sharon walking around this huge floor. I never paid attention when we came in, but this place was similar to the clothing section at Walmart. There were scarfs, hankies, purses and all sorts of stuff made out of silk. There was no manufacturing here. This place was nothing more than a scarf mart. I quickly left the video and caught up with Luann. This was going to be a waste of time and money if she were to buy anything. I followed her for a little bit, thinking about my train idea, when I saw a group of the guys going upstairs. The bathrooms must be up there and who knows what else. Anything is better than where I am currently. As I climbed the stairs and went through a glass enclosed hall way, I ended up in a bar. There was a bar. It had food, tables, people and drinks just waiting for me. I ordered my glass of wine, paid dearly for it, and looked for Luann from the balcony overlooking the scarf mart. She finally saw me, but she didn't have time to share a glass of wine with me because we had to board the bus again. One of the nice ladies from Michigan, Nancy, kiddingly asked me if I had bought anything. I looked her straight in the eye and said, "Yes, but I drank it already." She liked that and laughed. I can be pretty clever sometimes.

Our last stop in Cuomo was in the old section. It was the part of Cuomo that I liked the best. There were large squares in this area, loaded with shops, restaurants and lots of people. Luann and I had spent a lot of hours in this section on our last trip and getting our bearings was not difficult. The lake was across the busy highway, outlined with a black, heavy four inch round guard rail around its circumference. The harbor with all the tour boats and fishing boats was busy with people. Directly behind us was the main square and some of the most narrow, cobblestone streets you will ever walk on. When a car drove by you could almost feel it brush your arm. Pat and Sharon met up with us and we headed for the big square. We were supposed to be back by 6:30PM, which gave us a little less than two hours. I had not given up on my train idea and decided to bring it up again. It was received favorably by everyone. It's all timing. As we walked around, I saw a street vendor and between the four of us, we came up with four euros in coin to buy some grapes. They looked great. Sharon and Pat were a little skeptical and wished they had some sanitizer, but I popped some in my mouth and told them it would be ok. They smiled and we walked around town eating grapes.

Pat likes to walk and likes to lead. Luann and I have been here before, so we kind of hung back and let Pat lead us around. I knew how to get back if we got turned around. As we followed Pat out of the old section, I noticed that we where heading for the train station. What luck. We walked straight into it and I could not quit thinking of how much fun it would be to take the train back. As we approached the station, Luann and I talked about our experience eight years ago arriving at this station. There were a couple gentlemen with some books standing there waiting for some passerby to ask them what they had. There was a sales pitch in there somewhere. As we walked into the station, we looked at the schedules but couldn't make anything out of them. I went to an open ticket window and asked the lady if we could get to Stresa from here. She said yes. She wrote the number of the trains and the times and handed it to me. We had to do this exchange in Italian because she didn't speak much English. Luann and Pat had left the station and were waiting for Sharon and I as we walked out. I had the feeling that there would be no train ride tonight.

We walked out of the train station and took the steps down to the main street. The two gentlemen were still standing there handing out books and asked us if we were American. We just kept walking, as we knew that the pitch would come if we said anything. I had the train schedule in my hand and I could sense that there was not much interest now. It would be 8:00 PM or so before we got to Stresa and we did not know exactly where the train station was there. I knew it couldn't be too far from the hotel, but I didn't push it. If anyone felt the least bit apprehensive, it wouldn't be much fun going. We worked our way back to the square and the lake front, stopping at a museum. It was a square, white stone building right on the water front. Pat read the inscription on the outside wall and determined it was a museum dedicated to an electrical genius named Volt. I didn't make the connection. We walked in and walked right out because we really didn't have time to go through it. Walking back to the square, we looked for a place to have a beer or glass of wine. We had forty-five minutes before we needed to be on the bus and we didn't want to get in trouble again. The restaurant we found was the same restaurant that Luann and I had ate at years ago. It was small on the inside, but no one sat inside. The hundred or so people were all sitting at outdoor tables. This restaurant sat on the corner of the main street directly across from the lake. This street corner was very busy, with motorized and pedestrian traffic comingling effectively. There was a square across from it where people would stop and sit or just play with pets or soccer balls. The pidegeons would fly around not being an annoyance, but more part of the scenery. We sat down and waited for a waiter. We waited for quite some time before we received any service and unfortunately, we didn't get what we wanted. Pat and I wanted a dark beer and we got a regular beer. It was really my fault because we went to find the restrooms and Luann and Sharon were left to order. They couldn't speak any Italian and the waiter probably didn't speak English. It was ok, though. We enjoyed each others company and waited out the final minutes before we loaded back on the bus, which was parked on the other side of the square.

At 6:30PM, we loaded on the bus and started the ride back to Stresa. As we pulled out, I noticed some young kids at a bus stop smoking cigarettes and chatting. I was amazed at how many kids smoked over here. We did not go back the same we came, so the ride back was shorter. We even drove past the hotel we had stayed at eight years ago. It was the Intercontinental Hotel and I had found it. Luann thought that was kind of neat. Melissa reminded us that we were on our own for dinner and gave us the opportunity to vote on tomorrow's tour. Tomorrow we would be going to Bergamo to visit a castle, cathedral and vineyard. We were going to see how balsamic vinegar was made. The vote was merely to see if the group would rather leave an hour early to avoid the cathedral being closed for Sunday services. I refused to raise my hand as I knew that the vote would go which ever way the Michigan group voted. We were outnumbered three to one. Sure enough, it was determined that we would stay on the same schedule. We must have looked ridiculous to people passing us on the highway wondering what all those old people were doing with their hands raised. I sat quietly all the way, as Luann, Sharon and Pat dozed a little. I knew that before this tour was over, I was going to see the world's largets frying pan or the world's biggest ball of yarn. I couldn't contain my exhuberance at the thought.

We pulled into Stresa around 7:15 PM and everyone scattered once they got off the bus. Most of us went back to our baby hotel rooms to freshen up. Pat and Sharon said they would meet us in the lobby and we could dine together. We all met a short time later in the lobby and added more people to our dinner group. It was going to be our Iowa travel contingency, minus Doyle and Cindy. I saw them heading down the promenade along the lake. The rest of us, all ten, headed up town to see what our choices were. The suggestion was made to have a drink before dinner, which thank heaven, did not need to be voted on. We looked for a bar. We passed bars on every street. Some were too small to seat all ten of us, some looked like they were closed and some we just walked by. There we were, the ten of us, moving like the blob, inching our way up and down cobblestone streets. We would would walk in, look at the menu and the facility, then walk out. We finally found a place that was a small hotel. It was called Elena's. There was no one in the place, so we were able to get tables in the back for the ten of us. We were allowed to have a drink, with some complimentary potato chips, and just relax. This place turned out to be perfect. We sat, talked, joked around and took pictures all around the table. We had our drink, left the establishment and headed to find a restaurant for dinner.

The group had seen a place that specialized in pizza a couple blocks away from the square, which is where we were now standing. It looked very good and it had heat lamps for outside diners, which would come in handy as the night was cooling down pretty fast. When we arrived, they were too busy to seat us, so we left. We walked back to the square and found another hotel restaurant, called the Plantation and decided this was it. We told the server that we needed seats for ten and the staff quickly put chairs and tables together. We had a long table, with white table cloth right in the middle of the restaurant. There were not many people there, so we pretty much had the place to ourselves. A nice sixty some year old woman was going to be our waitress and I had to make sure that she knew the tickets would be separate and that we needed to be able to pay with credit card. She had given us the impression that she didn't speak English so I was forever chasing her down, talking to her in broken Italian, mixed with Spanish, a little English and a lot of Pig Latin. It turned out that her English was better than any of our Italian. We had a long, great dinner and at one point, the whole staff left the restaurant to watch a procession passing by. It was a Virgin Mary Feast day and the church congregation was doing a procession around the square to honor her. At first, we thought someone had gotten hurt outside the restaurant or that there was a funeral procession. It never ocurred to us that they probably don't bury people in the dark either.

We left the restaurant around 10:00 pm. Some of us walked around the block to work off some of the dinner, others went right back to the hotel. Again, we did both. We had heard from others that the hotel reception and doors were locked at 11:00 PM. We didn't need that kind of a hastle, so we went back after a short walk. It was time to call it a night. Overall, it had been a fun day. We decided to get a bottle of wine and two glasses and go up to our room and sit on the balcony. The hotel bar gladly sold us the bottle. We went to the reception desk and put in a request for a wake up call. Breakfast was at 7:30 and the bus was leaving at 8:30. We put the request in for a 6:30 AM wake up call. The little voice in the back of my head told me that it might be too early, but I didn't listen to it. Luann always woke up anyway, so it really didn't affect me. We got our bottle of wine and ran into Bob and Bonnie as they were getting ready to leave the hotel to make a call to their kids back home. Luann suggested that they go to Pat and Sharon's room because Pat had an international cell phone that could be used. She also mentioned that our cell phone was in Pat's room getting charged. Our charger didn't work. I've never been on a trip, where our technical tools were so inferior to everyone elses. I wonder what Bonie and Bob thought when they saw the bottle of wine in my hand.

We got back to the room, confident that we would sleep better than last night and headed for the balcony. I poured us a small glass of wine. The glasses here were like the coffee cups. They could have come out of a little kids play tea set because they were so small. The air on the balcony was too cold, so we went in. Luann read and I went back to my routine with the set. It was not any different than last night. In and out of bed changing channels and adjusting volume, playing with the power button and just giving up, finally concluded the nights ritual. The TV went off, reading light out and the deep sleep set in.